The Universal Rules of Dating

If you want to be a good date, don’t do all the talking, mostly just listen. Benjamin Disraeli, a British prime minister, who was renowned for his seductiveness said, Talk to a man about himself and he will listen for hours. One issue that occurs with dating, is we become too obsessed with ourselves and how we’re being perceived, rather than focusing on what our date has to say and giving them approval.

We should ask ourselves the question why we go for dating or that why am I dating, after fully establishing the basis of the same. In my opinion, it is because we feel we need a person to share our lives with and to love.

Getting to know someone well enough and keeping this in mind let’s get to the next essential part of dating. It’s difficult to know someone completely without inquiring of them. When on a date, you must be an investigator; you can’t love someone if you don’t know them and you may not want to be with the respective person once you get to know them.

We always take for granted the famous line: Just be yourself. We have all heard it. Being yourself may be misinterpreted. What it actually means is that you should be congruent with your principles and internal values. To be more specific, say and do whatever you thinks is right.

Honesty shows you are being yourself. Now, one might feels he is honest, even he is not being true to yourself. You are honest once you stop being proud and start saying what you actually think. Just take a chance. Now ,of course, you should only say what you want; if someone asks something you don’t want to answer, you are not obligated, just say you feel uncomfortable answering the respective question. This is really what honesty is all about. With practice you will learn to be your true self and diminish social anxiety. Being honest does not mean being rude, you must keep it in mind.

What is said above is easily said, but not everyone may have the courage. You are the only one who can keep yourself out of fear prison. Thomas Edison developed at least 10,000 incorrect ways to construct a light bulb. He tried and made mistakes and then learned from them. If you are afraid to be honest you may not ever be so unless you try saying what you think to your date and see what happens. You will see that they may open up their hearts too after you are honest with your date.

Another topic worth discussing is harmony. When on a date, harmony is very important. First, physical harmony. They dress harmoniously when people dress to impress. This one is very important. Your mood usually dictates your body language and people seem to know when other people are angry or afraid because the second one is mental; you must be in a good state when dating. An individual’s attitude can be pretty infectious too. Like this- if someone is grieving because their pet has just died then a friend arrives with the news that they had won the lottery, the grief will turn to jubilation, which means the strongest emotion wins out.

And let us not forget to mention: believe in yourself. You must not date with the person who didn’t like you. If you don’t like how the other person then leave, they may change their attitude. All said and done, you also have to be fair with yourself.

And last but not the least, Relax!

If you find this interesting, you can read more about my experience as an divorce attorney in Austin TX. You can also get a free copy of our Austin Divorce Guide Audio CD at www.TruslerLegal.com. If you need more specific information, you can take a look at our FAQ’s about divorce in Austin TX.