10 Ways to Master Speaking to Women
August 30, 2009 by amabaddate
Filed under dating tips
Ok guys, do you sometimes get the feeling that you just can’t be natural when it comes to talking to women? Are you a complete ’open mouth insert foot’ and ending up at a loss in your dating life because you keep turning women off when you talk to them? Then you see those guys who don’t seem to be any smarter than you or better looking and girls just seem to be totally interested in them. Why is that? Well, if you are ready to learn what you must know about communicating with women then here are ten ways to get your act together:
To start with you gotta stop trying to impress her. Women don’t like it when you try to decide for them about what they should think about you. If you really want to be able to communicate with a woman you better be yourself and let her decide what she thinks about you.
The second thing you must master is keeping your compliments about how beautiful she is to yourself. Believe me, if she’s nice to look at, she knows she is. She’s had men telling her for her entire life, so what’s the difference if you tell her what she has heard already? If you must say something nice, find something about her demeaner or her clothes.
The third thing is that you can’t be afraid to enter her space. This means that you touch her lightly on the arm when you talk or at least touch one of her possessions such as her purse or her wireless phone. You see, girls have this kind of radar and they can tell if you are uncomfortable. Then they get uncomfortable and when that happens they just decide they don’t like feeling like that and they book.
The fourth thing you must understand is boundaries. If you sense that a women is ready to end the conversation and you turn into that needy man who attempts to keep her from ending it she is going to check you off of her list. Think about it, she could be preoccupied or perhaps she is just a little nervous because she is actually interested in you. Either way, if you come off as needy she is going to leave you in the dust.
The fifth thing to get a hold of is the art of ’negging’. In other words, you mention something about her that is negative or even unattractive. Just do it in a respectful manner and don’t be cruel or insulting. This will suggest to her that she has to compensate for it and before she knows it she will be all over you attempting to win your attention.
Sixth, you must learn to create sexual tension. Now this is a thing which puts the unfortunate nice guys out of the game when it comes to girls. You see, sexual attraction between a male and a female requires some dissonance for it to be effective. Which means that you oppose her and even challenge her in a fun sort of way.
The seventh thing is comfort building. The problem is that a lot of guys attempt to do this by bending to her every need and being a nice boy. Sorry, that is going to make her feel really uneasy. Why? Because a girl feeling comfortable is all about her being comfortable with your capacity to keep her safe, softness just won’t do the trick when it comes to that.
That brings us to the eighth key to attracting women and that is being the alpha male in place of the ’mr. nice guy’. You see, a woman is not attracted to the nice guy because she is concerned that he won’t have the ability to make her feel safe. Being the tough guy is going to make her feel comfortable around you and as she feels comfortable she is going to let down her defenses.
Number nine, take action and pursue what you want. Women are a lot better at being easy on guys for moving too fast or making a mistake than they are to put up with a guy who is slow or indecisive. If you wait around to see how she feels about you before you take initiative, don’t be shocked if she ends up being snatched up by a guy who goes after what he wants.
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Finally, approach the woman who is a bit ’out of reach’ and who may not appear that she really care to have a man in her life. A lot of men are just afraid of a confident woman. This simply means that there is less competition so if you are the man who takes a chance to pursue the seemingly out of reach girl you are probably the man who is going to get to have her.
Just be sure to make a habit of each one of these steps and don’t give up unless you want to wind up hanging out at the arcade with the other nice boys on Saturday nights. Have fun!
