On The Verge Of A Break-up?

July 28, 2010 by  
Filed under dating tips

Are you in the middle of a tough break-up?  Or are you and your partner considering a separation or “break” from one another?  Are you wondering “How to save my relationship”?  Break-ups can be incredibly difficult and painful for both people involved, even if you’re the one doing the breaking-up.  And so often today, many people who break up could have actually stayed together or gotten back together if they had gotten the right advice and information.  If you are interested in learning, “How to get my boyfriend back,” (or girlfriend) or if you are on the verge of a break-up, there are some things you should know.

Is making-up really going to be better for you (and your partner) in the long run?  If you are involved in an abusive relationship (either physical or emotional abuse), you are probably better off without your partner.  It can be incredibly hard, but you need to 1) Make a clean break.  Tie up loose ends and be clear that it is a permanent break, 2) Distance yourself from your ex in whatever way(s) you can, as quickly as you can, and 3) MOVE FORWARD with your life!

Another crucial thing to consider when trying to determine if you should break-up or make-up is how your trusted friends and family members feel about your partner.  If the majority of people you care about and trust do not like your boyfriend or girlfriend, they probably have pretty strong reasons why.  ASK THEM!  Request that they be honest and just give it to your straight.  Although it may be difficult to hear, you NEED to know the TRUTH.

Next, try to picture your life before you met your partner.  Compare that with how your life is now.  Try to honestly determine if you were happier and/or healthier before you got together with your boyfriend/ girlfriend.  If the answer is “yes,” next try to picture your life next year.  First, picture it with your partner and you still together.  Then picture it as if you have broken up.  Which scenario is more positive and healthier for you?  BE HONEST.

For more information about relationships, check out The Magic of Making Up eBook Download.


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Ex Boyfriend or Girfriend Shows Interest – What To Do

October 7, 2009 by  
Filed under dating tips

If your ex is showing you a little more interest, or seems more
interested in going out and spending time with you than before, or it seems like they want to make up or if you notice signs that your ex is trying to flirt with you, then it’s okay to be a little hopeful but you need to avoid jumping the gun. Are you asking yourself “does my ex want to get back with me”?

These are definitely very common signs that your ex is interested in getting you back. But even if you want to get back with your ex, you should not simply jump into things. The best way to work this is to play hard to get (in moderation), which is probably what your ex will best respond to anyway. If you simply jump into things full force, then you may find your ex pushing you back again. In fact, if your ex is giving indications that he or she wants you back, then the chances are, it was you playing hard to get that led to the renewed interest in the first place.

Usually when you break up with your ex, or he or she breaks up with you, there is a natural level of missing one another, or longing to get back together. This is especially true following a relationship of a year or longer. Your ex is probably going to miss you no matter what, because of how many memories were shared together during this period of time. But there can be other emotions that come into play including past regrets. If you are wondering “does my ex want to get back with me” the chances are that your ex may be thinking the same thing for the same reasons.

Sometimes when an ex shows interest again following a break up however,
it is only a game. They may see that you love them, and they may simply be trying to get more attention, without actually intending to get you back. So, unless your ex really seems genuinely interested in spending time
with you, they may just be passing the time because they have no other prospects on the horizon. And worst of all they  may see this as away to get revenge for some perceived wrong. This is why it is important not to jump the gun, and why you should focus on readinginto the situation before you act on it. This is true for both ex boyfriends and ex girlfriends.

This is common, and a lot of people find themselves wondering “does my ex want to get back with me?”, but the truth is, its better to get a feel for the situation before you act. In reality, if your ex does want to get back with you, playing hard to get (in moderation) is the best scenario because it will prevent you from getting hurt if your ex is not really serious about getting back with you.

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Breaking up - The How Not To

October 5, 2009 by  
Filed under dating tips

You know when you see your significant other approaching you. That same old familiar feeling hits your stomach just the same as it does when you see a car crash happening seconds before it actually does. You can tell that the infamous break up speech is soon to come and one of you will have bad feelings about the whole situation. This feeling can go on forever.

You can still remember meeting that wonderful person just last year. The waiting in-between date nights seemed like it took forever. You both brought out the best in one another from her cuteness to his humor. You liked all the same things and the whole world was made of music and gumballs. Then, evil and heartache crept it, somewhere between the falling in love stage and the like you stage. The tulips wilted in the moonlight. The romance wilted. Just the sound of his voice makes you want to scream at times. The way she crinkles her nose reminds you of Mrs. Piggy and sex is non-existent.

It’s believed that in every relationship, there’s at least one time where someone considers The Break Up. Most concentrate on the How and Why things went south but it's very rare to find someone that's really considering the Fix. Of course, it is important to figure out what happened. But don't waste your time dissecting it and putting it under a microscope. Knowing how to fix things is the most important factor.

There are 3 Fix Methods Doomed to Fail:

1. The Stubborn and Prideful Method
Why does it have to be me that changes? Why should all the work done in this relationship be done by me? This way of thinking will definitely make sure that nobody makes a change and one person plays the role of the victim. This puts the couple against each other.

2. A Mexican Stand-Off
If he would go to counseling, then I'll go. I'll quit when she does. This will certainly ensure that both people are miserable if the relationship continues and no matter who breaks their stare, breaking up is certain.

3. The Bait-and-Switch
You'll change if you love me. In this method, all responsibility is taken off of the message sender and is projected onto the one who will end up thinking, "Why do I have to change if you say you love me?"?

The real method that actually works, is so simple that it even sounds a bit like an old cliché. You can only work on YOU and no one else. The relationship has pulled you in and you're lost. The relationship overshadowed you and you’re stagnant in the cesspool of denial and hatred. But, you can change all that!

First and most importantly, remember the YOU that existed before the relationship. That is the person he/she fell for. It wasn't because you picked up after yourself or were awesome at remembering anniversaries. But because you used to be a great YOU.

Next, let go of all that negativity. Forgive and forget is an important statement that needs to be learned. It is the key. Believe me, once you have worked on you, things will be much easier. You can go right back toward the place of negative thoughts and words if you end up arguing and being hurtful toward one another. Before you try to save the remains of your relationship, ask yourself this: Do you say anything NEW? Do you really just play the same song in a different location.

Last but not least, execute! However, make sure that you are making the changes for you and only you! Keep this in mind, you simply cannot keep pretending to be a person that you are not. When you do pretend or if you aren't doing it for yourself but for your partner, then it's not going to work. Fortunately for you, you can start immediately.

You will begin to see remarkable changes in your romantic life and it should be an almost overnight change. You will be seen by your partner as the person they first met. And, you will be busy just being you. Breaking up will no longer be the answer.

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Guy’s Guide to Getting an Ex Back

September 3, 2009 by  
Filed under dating tips

 

Most people who were dumped immediately start asking “What can I do to get her back?”.They doubt their own actions and regret how they could have avoided the breakup.They think that an explanation and outpouring of undying love will will their ex back.

This is often a dead end from the main reason that: you don’t know the real reason why the breakup happened in the first place.Sometimes women become so emotional that it may not be obvious the real causes behind the breakup.It’s said to be a waste of time trying to uncover what really happened.

Your Alone Time

The first key strategy to getting back on track is to stop looking for answers on how to get your ex back and putting your energy into something else.Make some new friends and just have some plain fun. You need to concentrate just on you and not your ex.Be sure to remain chill when it comes meeting new people and having expectations for yourself.

You should allow yourself a few months to allow enough time for adjustments to happen in your life.Taking time apart from your ex will help in so many ways.

As a result, you’ll be able to have the changes in your life start to take shape.And in how you perceive the subject of relationships.After the time apart has passed, you will have a better understanding on what you want from life and if getting back together is something that you want.

Making the Decision

Now you should know if you really want your ex back. Would you like to reconnect with your ex? You should be able to know by now.If you do want your ex back, then you should attempt to uncover if she still has feelings for you.

This time, you can be more confident when approaching your ex.Always remember that you need to play tactically, however.Keep cool and relaxed. You should not plead or get so emotional at this point.

Maintaining a cool and collected attitude is the most favorable  thing you can do right now.If you followed the first rule correctly by keeping a distance, then she should be missing you by now.You can also play a little hard to get, to keep things interesting. But don’t over do it.This is cause her to reconsider her decision regarding the break up.

It Was Meant to Be

And if it is really suppose to happen, then you will be able to get her back.Be wary not to over examine  things between you two. This can cause you to lose your composure and stop you from thinking straight.Remember again, to take things slow and play it cool. You will do just fine.

 

 

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Road for Healing After a Breakup

August 13, 2009 by  
Filed under dating tips

After a breakup, your emotions seems upside down.As with any type of change, we may feel empty and lost.Commonly, breakups will make us feel sad.

Feeling down or depressed doesn’t have to be a long drawn out time.In reality, you still have a good probability of getting back together with your ex.You can still work it out if you’re the only one prepared to give it a chance.

To start, we need to examine the first stage  of the breakup.Later on, we will ba visiting helpful strategies on how toe save you relationship.

Keeping Busy

Keeping yourself busy is your first line of protection after your destructive breakup.It’s a critical moment to keep your mind busy from thoughts of your ex.You must try to adhere to this rule after a breakup.Having your mind occupied can help out so much in your thereputic process.

Now is a great time to try something new like weight lifting or hobby.You’re open to do what you want. Take a friend with you and share the experience.As the old saying goes, Enjoy the Day! Carpe Diem.

Get Up and Get Out

After a breakup, its very common for people to get very anti-social and sleeping in.The issue is that you might take on a habit of being a hermit if you don’t change.You mind and body will be able to function better through movement and training.

You’ll have to important benefits if you start working out.First of all, you will be getting healthier.Secondly, you will feel better about yourself.As a result, you will have more confidence when you start getting back in the dating scene.

Expressing Yourself and Your Emotions

By now, you should start seeking your support system.Choose people that you can rely on and are open to listening to you.They are there to help you get through this tough time and be there to see you to the other side.Being able to vent your emotions is an important step to your recovery.Your friends and family can help you review the stages of a breakup and resolve the problems that lead up to this.

Plus, you will be able to pinpoint your mistakes of the past and learn how to handle them in the future.It will help you if you choose to get back with your ex.

Win Your Ex Back.

Commonly, people try to reason with their ex that a big mistake was made by breaking up with them.They make an effort to make their ex be repentant for the decision of breaking up.This simply won’t work and it has not worked for a variety of reasons.

You have to fend off  your natural tendencies.because it simply won’t work because of human nature.You may wnat to be terrified but you just need to relax and breath for a second.There are many ways that you can get your ex to change their point of view about the breakup.

It may seem completely wrong and destructive, but that is soley the main reason why it works.The path is opposite to what most people think.

 

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